Girls Night In

the blog for single, over-40 women

Love Comes Around

on October 3, 2015
image by StuartMiles/

image by StuartMiles/

This has been an eventful week in the lives of my friends.

One friend, a 40-something who started dating very late in life, has been seeing her guy for two years. This week they sent out the Save the Dates. She met him at church. He is older, a young Christian, physically not “her type,” and generally not anything like what she thought she might be looking for. But he gives her the kind of good love for which we have spent years praying.

Another friend, who is closing in on 40, has been dating her guy for a month.  After a very sweet and thoughtful thing he did, she realized she has found the man who may be the man she will spend the rest of her life with here on earth.  Bonus–he feels the same. She met him on Tinder (which, it turns out, is not just for hookups), after a series of dates with other people that were duds. He’s a couple of years older than she is, has never been married and has no children. He’s not single because he’s got a ton of issues, but rather because he took extended time to not date while he worked on his issues. My friend had no idea such a man existed.

A different friend in her late-40s came to the realization that the guy she has been seeing–who does things like drive down from Richmond to Durham on the weekends and sleep at her friends’ home to safeguard her reputation–is a keeper. She is afraid of the finality of marriage but wants to love him more than she wants to remain in her zone of safety. After much patience on his part, she is letting him know she is ready to commit. They met on Christian Mingle and have been together for three years. In age, temperament and education, he is totally different than the man she imagined God might have for her.

My roommate, who is in her early 30s, has never been on an official date. Naturally, I have been her biggest encourager to break that habit sooner rather than later. She’s been feeling confident and beautiful lately and this week decided to join an online dating site for the first time ever–which she previously swore was not for her. Within one day she had made contact with a suitable man who immediately locked in a date with her five days in the future. I assured her it was very rare indeed for an online suitor to be that direct and intentional about getting together. In a matter of hours now, she will have crossed the dating line and begun life’s great adventure–the search for a healthy loving relationship with another.

Being a woman who loves love, I am elated by all the love blossoming around me. It encourages me to live with expectancy. Love is there to be found in many different places, on many different websites and in many different guises. Oh, for the openness, courage and resilience to continue to look for it.

What love stories have encouraged you most recently?


2 responses to “Love Comes Around

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