Girls Night In

the blog for single, over-40 women

Dating Starts and Non-Starts

on September 3, 2015
image courtesy of Stuart Miles/

image courtesy of Stuart Miles/

For most of the usual reasons, I find myself back in the cycle of seeking love through electronic means. Online dating. There has been a steady stream of interest but not too many viable prospects.

Here are some highlights:

There was “YouknowyI’mhere.” He was cute and his introductory message made me laugh. But he mysteriously stopped communicating with me after a few contacts.

There was “Telebeat.” He seemed sincere and direct in his introductory message. I admired that, like me, he had returned to school in his 40s to change careers. We were communicating for not too long online when he gave me his number and invited me to call him. The next evening I texted to ask if he was free to chat on the phone. He replied that he was in class and would call me later. I never heard from him again.

The abrupt disconnect is a “thing” online, apparently.

Because my quest for love, or even like, was not progressing with the men who initiated contact with me, one evening I decided to do some initiating of my own.

“AlphaOnyx919” got a short “hello” message from me since his profile was humorous and intelligent, and in his photos he looked gorgeous. He sent a brief reply right away. The next day, during our first conversation (via text), he asked me what I was looking for. I said something along the lines of friendship with potential. AlphaOnyx919 said, him too. “No pressure at all.”

Right after this he asked how I felt about intimacy. Not wanting to presume anything, especially that he was simply hoping for a hook-up, I inquired as to what he thought of as intimacy. Two days later he got back to me and said he had not seen my text. Then he said that by intimacy he meant cuddling, kissing and sex. My response was that it might be better to have a conversation about sexual intimacy after, say, we had actually met. Like, in person. He never responded.

Then there was “Squireman1963,” or as I like to call him, “6-2-52,” which describes his height and age. I liked the laid back read of his profile. In his photos he seemed stylish and comfortable. He looked like a man who took care of himself and enjoyed life. 6-2-52 reached out to me early one morning with a few sentences admiring my beauty. It was a strong start. Compliments are always good. I thanked him for starting my day off with a smile.

The next morning he sent another cheerful flattering message. This garnered another smile from me and a longer note in response. On day three we had our first conversation (via text), which went well. The next day we had a longer conversation by text, which went even better. He was polite, engaging and had a good sense of humor. I suggested we talk on the phone. He gave me his phone number and said call anytime.

That was earlier today.

I will let you know how it goes.

How have your online dating adventures gone?


4 responses to “Dating Starts and Non-Starts

  1. Carole says:

    Best wishes on it being the “right” man!

  2. Karen says:

    How did it go with 6-2-52?

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